The day after the Solheim. Confrontations.

It’s the day after the Solheim Cup and Michelle Wie, Paula Creamer, Morgan Pressel, Christina Kim and Cristie Kerr are on the practice putting green:

Cristie: “OK – your first lesson. And remember to make out two cheques afterwards – one for my breast cancer charity and one for me”.

Paula: “USA. USA”.

Morgan: “And let’s hear it for the Europeans too”.

All (except Cristie): “OK then – USA. USA. All The Way. All The Way”.

Christina: Flapping her elbows up and down. “Tweet tweet birdie birdie birdie. Yeee Haaaa”.

Michelle: “Why do we need these putting lessons now anyway? We won the Cup didn’t we?”

Cristie: “Because we should’ve won easily against those Euro jokes. Like that putt you missed on #18 when I played with you. I was very annoyed at you for that. Lucky for us Suzann is such a lousy putter and couldn’t hole her 20+ footer so it didn’t matter.”

Michelle: “B-b-but that was from the edge of the green. I did exactly what you told me to do. And it so nearly went in. It would have been awesome if it had”.

Cristie: “Good for you maybe - but not for me. And anyway you couldn’t have played it like I told you to because it didn’t go in”.

Cristie: “Here – Christina – try and make a putt.” – throws a ball about 40 ft from the hole.”

Christina Kim putts but it’s always going way left. But she twists her body this way and that and gives it the full works “Oooh “Aaaah” jumps up and down at the end “Oh sooo close. I’ll make birdie next time, Tweet Tweet and wiggle my ass.”

Cristie: “That missed by 10 ft on the left you annoying person. What a lousy putt.”

Christina Kim slams her putter down. Starts crying and runs off. “Oh I’ve let my team down. I’ve let Cristie down”.



Somewhere else Suzann Pettersen bumps into Brittany Linicombe

Suzann: “Congratz on winning the cup Brittany – we’ll get you next time”

Brittany: “Oh it was f***ing awesome”

Suzann: annoyed at this. “Look - you may have won the f***ing Solheim Cup but as far as dropping the “f” bomb you’re an f***ing amateur compared to me”.



Later after their lesson – it’s Michelle Wie, Paula Creamer, Morgan Pressel and Christina Kim again.

Christina: Hey Michelle – there’s a party tonight. Would you like to come along.

Michelle: “Ooh yes – you guys are great. But I’m going to be with Mum and Dad. Is it OK if I bring Dad along.”

Paula, Morgan & Christina: frightened look of horror on their faces “Ermm Umm Err …”

Morgan: eventually “You know I’ve just remembered. We can’t go to the party. Cristie was really cross with us and told us to have an early night and no parties before our putting lesson with her tomorrow”

Paula & Christina: “Yes that’s right she did”.

Michelle: “Oh OK – see you tomorrow then” and walks away.

Morgan: To Christina “I thought you said that ‘come out your shell and be your own person’ potion you slipped in her drink wasn’t supposed to wear off.”



In the hotel where the Europeans are staying – there’s a lot of noise from where Laura Davies, Alison Nicholas and Joanne Morley are standing.

Laura: “Why did you drop me? It was bad enough not playing me Friday afternoon. But not playing me the whole of Saturday – and I had to face the media and tell them all that crap how I loved supporting the team and didn’t mind not playing. And I thought you were my friend”.

Just then Becky Brewerton passes by and heard this.

Becky: “She dropped you cos you were crap. Jeez I had to play on my own with you hacking in the rough all the time on Friday morning”.

Laura: “Excuse me. Did someone give you permission to speak Miss “I lost my singles match 5 & 4”.

Becky: “Well I won both my foursomes when I had a decent partner Miss ‘I choked my singles 2 UP lead away on the last 2 holes’”.

Alison: “Now calm down everyone. Laura – the reason I dropped you was I wanted to rest you so you were fresh for your singles”.

Laura: Not listening and still fuming at Becky. “Listen four-eyes - I did not choke. That was so unlucky on the #18. I mean what are the chances of losing your ball in the hazzard like that.”

Alison, Joanne & Becky look at each other and decide not to say anything as Laura storms off.

Alison: to Joanne “Do you think she’ll be OK if I play her this second inspirational DVD I’ve got from Seve?”

[LoJo]

Hahahaha......very good waldorf! Enjoyed it.

[MarinePaul]

Very creative.

[mothra87]

Not really my kind of thing ...

[BigBurt]

I'm trying to determine if it is ment to be humor or sarcasim.

[Saint-Just X]

Nicely done,Waldorf...

Pax Vobiscum
Saint-Just X

Originally Posted by BigBurt

I'm trying to determine if it is ment to be humor or sarcasim.

Humour - a just for fun thread.

[BigBurt]

Thanks for the clarification. thought it also might have been sour grapes. Maby you need humour lessons from Dangerbob. Ha Ha

[greentee]

Originally Posted by BigBurt

I'm trying to determine if it is meant to be humor or sarcasm.

Wow, those were the exact words I was going to write. Eh, good to know I am not alone.

It does have both doesn't it. Its a big world though, room for more then just a few views. :-)

Originally Posted by BigBurt

Thanks for the clarification. thought it also might have been sour grapes. Maby you need humour lessons from Dangerbob. Ha Ha

Each to his own for humour. If Dangerbob's jokes are the only thing you find funny - well good for you. As to me - I think I'd rather endure one of Cristie's putting lessons above than a Dangerbob lesson in humour. Ha Ha.